Is low libido affecting your relationship?

Low libido is one of the most common sexual dysfunctions. If you are married or in a long term relationship and you are not having sex often, chances are at least one of you is unhappy about it.

Is it low libido?

Stress, relationship conflicts, hormonal changes, exhaustion or burnout from work or running after kids, or even feeling uncomfortable with your own body are all common causes of low libido.

Some people experience low sexual desire their whole lives. Research has indicated that approximately 30 to 39 percent of women report little to no interest in having sex.

If a lack of desire is not causing distress; for example, if a woman is not in a relationship and is not unhappy about the lack of sex in her life, then it is not considered a dysfunction. However, if she is in a relationship with a loving partner and she likes him but is not sexually receptive, this is likely a problem that should be addressed.

When left untreated, tension that begins in the bedroom often begins to cause stress in other aspects of a relationship.

How low libido affects your relationship

When one partner has a low sex drive, this impacts both people in the relationship. The partner with the low sex drive may feel anxious about connecting in and out of the bedroom and how their lack of sex drive is impacting the relationship. They may also be concerned that there is something wrong with them and not understand what it is.

On the other hand, the partner with the greater sex drive may feel rejected or undesirable. It can be unsatisfying to try to enjoy yourself when your partner seems to be only going through the motions, or just enjoying themselves less. This can lead to distress and a sense of unfulfillment in the relationship.

Low libido is common and treatable

Many people are surprised to find that low libido is a very common problem and there are things that can be done to increase your libido. While we commonly assume that sex is "natural" and that things should simply fall into place, the reality is that the most unhelpful thing you can do is wait for your or your partner's low libido to resolve itself.

Feeling embarrassed or ashamed or thinking the issue cannot be changed can prevent a person from receiving the help they need. There are many options available for treating low libido in both men and women. The issue could be physical, emotional, or a result of unhealthy aspects in your relationship, and the treatment should focus on your individual situation.

If you are unsure of what is causing your low libido, seek help from a doctor and/or sex therapist. A sex therapist is trained in all things related to healthy sexual functioning. Sexual activity is NEVER a part of your actual therapy session. If you have an issue affecting your sexual function or your sexual relationship, she can help discover what it is and work with you to address the problem.

If you are suffering from low libido, it is important to seek help for the sake of yourself and your partner. If you would like to learn more you are welcome to visit my website,, and give me a call for a free consultation.

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